Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Funny Fashionista Pick: Spoiled

Spoiled
by Heather Cocks & Jessica Morgan
Poppy (Hachette Book Group)
2011
360 pages
ISBN: 978-0-316-09825-0

Funny, cocky, cock-sure (one author's last name is Cocks, for goodness sake), quirky, mean-spirited, and fashion-forward, Spoiled is a laugh-out-loud, in-your-face commentary of what it's like to grow up rich, spoiled and bitchy in Beverly Hills. Part "90210," part "Mean Girls," part "Pretty Little Liars" this novel will appeal to savvy readers with a passion for fashion and a penchant for naughty, haughty runway model ideals and diva behavior.

Brooke Berlin is the sixteen year old daughter of macho, masculine, and beautiful man-hunk Hollywood action movie star Brick Berlin. Brick has never met a camera, or a woman, he didn't like. His hazel eys, his brooding good looks, and his stone cold abs leave women fainting in his wake. Brooke hopes to use her father's celebrity to open her own doors. When she's out power shopping on Rodeo Drive--her favorite past-time--she manages to catch the eyes of the papparazzi, stealing the thunder from "one of the lesser Kardashians." (funny, right?)

Her life is sweet--being the pampered princess in a huge Hollywood mansion--the mansion so huge that their house "embarrassed mansions" nearby--armed with an assistant named after a creamy French cheese--Brie, and a best friend named after a peppery, fancy lettuce--Arugula, and able to spend unlimited amounts of cash and credit on fashion finds should make a girl happy, but Brooke longs for her father's undivided attention--she needs some serious "face time" with Poppa. Just once, she would love five minutes alone with her famous father--without interruptions from his agent, his publicist, his assistant, his assistant's assistant, his astrologist, his trainer, or any of the other minions who flock to his famous feet. Poor, spoiled Brooke remains a Paris Hilton wanna-be with serious daddy issues. Her mother escaped Hollywood years earlier without looking back and has no relationship at al with her only daughter.

Enter Molly. Molly arrives out of nowhere from Cairo Park, Indiana. Her mother Lauren has just died after battling cancer, and on her death bed, announces that Molly is the secret daughter of Brick Berlin, famous Hollywood movie star. They met when Lauren was a costume designer on one of Brick's films. His films are quirkily titled like "Tequila Mockingbird" where his character "rescued his fiancee from South American sex slavery." Molly has no other living relatives, and she is shipped off to Hollywood to meet her famous new father and her half-sister.

There is no way Brooke is going to share the spotlight with some hayseed from Indiana and no way she's going to share a precious moment with their father--HER father. Brooke begins a campaign to let Molly know just how unwanted her presence is.

Enter Shelby, spoiled daughter of the entertainment industry's seedy tabloid magazine Hey! She makes it her job to befriend Molly, ruin Brooke, and gather notoriety for her own celebrity reporting. Shelby's an evil schemer who craves drama and spreads gossip. She invents half-lies and rumors and has the two celebrity siblings soon fighting.

The Hollywood glamour set always has had their bizarre behavior--from throwing parties for their pets to naming their kids. Spaulding, for example, is the the daughter of a professional tennis player who sold the naming rights to his kid (Spaulding tennis balls). Molly--the "normal" mid-west girl says, "Good thing he wasn't in NASCAR...she would have been named Valvoline!"

This novel has it all--sister in-fighting, abandonment issues by a parent, absent mother figures, clique-ish high school behavior, severe cattiness, and finally a happy ending.

Spoiled was a gift to read--impossible to put down and tickled my funny bone. Girls will love the unforgettable characters of Brooke and Molly and laugh at the fashion and celebrity jokes, like Brooke's nerves "were as frayed as a pair of tights on Taylor Momsen." (I know, funny, right?)

Recommended grades 7-12. Younger girls may not "get" the puns and fashion jokes or the snarky comments about the Hollywood in-crowd.

No sex. One f-bomb but it is well-deserved. The authors write the fashion blog Go Fug Yourself--check it out--clever and catty.

FTC Required Disclaimer: I received this book from the publisher. I did not received monetary compensation for this review.

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