Chick Pick: Decked With Holly

Decked With Holly
by Marni Bates
Kensington Publishing
2012
244 pages


Funny, snarky, quaint and heartfelt, Decked With Holly is a great Christmas surprise! The cover--with its seasonal red and green title, the mistletoe, the girl in the Santa hat and the Christmas tree--will welcome readers to pick it up. Julie Kagawa says, “Fans of Meg Cabot will find Marni’s voice equally charming and endearing.” I loved the seasonal cover but I think the girl on the cover looks much older than a teenager.

After Holly embarrasses herself in front of an entire mall full of festive shoppers and their children by slapping a perverted, drunk Santa and then falling over the Christmas tree and wrecking the decorations, she embarks on a cruise with her entire family: her beloved grandpa, her mean-spirited, bullying aunt and two model thin girl cousins from hell.

Holly is seasick and puke-y and finds herself roomless kicked out of her stateroom by her evil cousins. She grabs a blanket and heads for the deck thinking that she’ll spend the night in a deck chair. A wave of nausea overcomes her and she ducks into the nearest open door, finding the bathroom and vomiting. Next thing she knows, she’s leaving the bathroom and someone yells and mistakes her for a zombie and sprays pepper spray in her face.

Nick is 1/3 of a rock band called ReadySet; they are the “next big thing” and have hordes of screaming teen females stalking them and paparazzi vying for their pictures. Nick takes a break from the crazed fan-hoopla and books a cruise. He doesn’t know that a deathly sick girl is puking her guts up in his bathroom. He sees someone leaving his bathroom and freaks out, spraying that someone with pepper spray.

When they are both caught by the "paps" and photographed, Nick has to spin the story the right way for the band’s sake. Holly agrees to be Nick’s fake girlfriend for the duration of the cruise. Nick and Holly display wonderful back and forth banter that runs the gamut from sarcasm to ugly insults. Holly makes fun of Nick’s celebrity status, and Nick calls her “The Mess.”

When the fauxmance is over, what is left? Readers will love Holly—a believable character who’s not the typical romance novel drop dead gorgeous—she’s a “normal” girl. They will love Nick, too; he’s a rock star who’s a real guy. Girls will be smitten by this frolicking read.

Highly, highly recommended grade 8-up. No sex, but the mention of sex and virginity does come up. Some kissing and holding hands. No language except “slutty” and Holly gives a wave with her middle finger extended.


FTC Required Disclaimer: I purchased this book for myself because I need a "light" girl-y read after so many dark dystopias. I will add it to the library shelves for more mature readers. It is pretty tame even by television standards. "Gossip Girl" is way more scandalous.

This review has been posted in compliance with the FTC requirements set forth in the Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising (available at ftc.gov/os/2009/10/091005revisedendorsementguides.pdf)

Teen Pick: 52 Reasons To Hate My Father

52 Reasons to Hate My Father
by Jessica Brody
Farrar Straus Giroux Books for Young Readers
2012
352 pages

See the book trailer here

Outrageously witty, snarky and bitingly sarcastic, and dripping with teen drama queen behavior, 52 Reasons To Hate My Father is this year’s best guilty pleasure.

Lexington Larrabee is a spoiled teen queen who has everything: a giant McMansion complete with servants, a shiny new Mercedes convertible, scads of designer duds, private planes with pilots who can fly her anywhere in the world at the drop of a hat, credit cards with no limits, and piles of cash. The only thing she’s missing is a real family. Her father is always too busy running his billion dollar empire to “visit” Lexington at their palatial mansion. Her mother died many years before, and her older brothers are grown up and on their own. Lexi acts out and exhibits true bad girl behavior—underage drinking and clubbing; she wrecks her brand new Mercedes, and she’s in for it this time!

Her father calls his clean-up squad and they cover up everything before the press can get all the details. He takes away Lexington’s trust fund of $25 million that was supposed to be hers in a few weeks when she turns eighteen. He hires an assistant who will oversee –babysit—Lexington for the next 52 weeks. If she can work at 52 menial jobs on her father’s list and complete each week without quitting or being fired, she will get her trust fund back. Lexi is livid! Lexington Larrabee work as a maid? Clean houses? Muck horse stalls? Serve fast food? No way! Her dad can’t make her do that.

Sadly for her, she finds out he can and he does. He cancels her credit cards and freezes her bank accounts; he instructs all his employees that no one is to take Lexington anywhere unless it’s to her job. He puts Luke, a twenty year old intern, in charge of her and she can’t catch a break. Luke drives her to and from each job and demands that she send him updates for each week.

Lexington hates her father! And Luke! She drags herself from one awful job to the next until she starts a week at Don Juan Tacos, a fast food place. She actually starts having fun. Rolando, a co-worker, shows her how to have fun at the job and she realizes that if she changes her attitude, she might just have fun, too. Pretty soon, Lexi is looking for “awesomeness” of everything. Luke even notices the changes in her behavior.

Girls who love teen divas getting what’s coming to them will love Lexington Larrabee. And we all want her lifestyle. This novel is indeed a “comedy of heiress.”

The book cover is spot-on. The surly attitude on Lexington’s face, the fast food hat, the diamond jewelry, and the flash of the camera bulbs will cause teens to stop in their tracks and pick up this book. The mop bucket, mop and rubber gloves on the back cover give it a comic touch.

Highly, highly recommended grades 7-up. It does mention that Lexington has drinks and wrecks her car but she does have consequences. That’s the worst of it. No drugs or other bad behavior. A pretty good kiss with Luke. It is pretty tame compared to what teen girls see on t.v. Even the Family Channel is pretty racy these days.

FTC Required Disclaimer: I received this book from the publisher. I did not receive monetary compensation for this review.

High School Pick: Famous

Famous
by Todd Strasser
Simon & Schuster
2011
259 pages

Timely, poignant, brutally honest and rife with in-your-face social commentary about America's need for celebrity gossip, Famous will resonate with teen readers.

Jamie Gordon always wanted to take pictures; she is really good with her camera and her boyfriend Nasim thinks she is truly talented. In a chance encounter, Jamie just happens to be at the right place at the right time with her camera ready. She gets candid shots of a famous super-model slapping her son in a coffee shop and sells them to a tabloid for more money than most teens will ever see--"just for taking some pictures."

When the chance of a lifetime occurs, Jamie finds herself in L.A. shadowing America's hottest Hollywood sweetheart Willow Twine--who has been in a bit of trouble lately. Willow is dating a rock star of questionable background and morals, she's been in trouble with the law, and now movie studios are seeing her as more of a financial risk than box office gold (sound familiar?) When Jamie discovers some shots in her camera that she didn't take--photos that will ruin Willow's career but make Jamie famous--she is torn. Does she ruin a teen dream or take the money and run?

Avy is Jamie's friend in New York. He has dreams of becoming a super-hot mega star model/actor in Hollywood. He sells everything he owns and gets a cheap apartment in L.A. Avy soon finds out that shedding a few pounds is not the answer to fame in a town known for devouring thousands of young hopefuls each year. Avy makes crucial mistakes and falls in with the wrong crowd scene. Readers will like Avy--his naivete, his vulnerability, and his ulitmate defeat will have readers' empathy.

Strasser has captured the illusory celebrity lifestyle and pampered existence of young Hollywood. The novel's ominous tone is apparent from the opening pages and savvy readers will guess what will happen to Jamie, Willow, and Avy, but they may just be surprised!

Highly, highly recommended grades 9-up. Typical Hollywood behavior that you might read about in tabloids: drug use, partying, underage drinking, sex.

FTC Required disclaimer: I received this book from the publisher. I did not receive monetary compensation for this review.

Funny Fashionista Pick: Spoiled

Spoiled
by Heather Cocks & Jessica Morgan
Poppy (Hachette Book Group)
2011
360 pages
ISBN: 978-0-316-09825-0

Funny, cocky, cock-sure (one author's last name is Cocks, for goodness sake), quirky, mean-spirited, and fashion-forward, Spoiled is a laugh-out-loud, in-your-face commentary of what it's like to grow up rich, spoiled and bitchy in Beverly Hills. Part "90210," part "Mean Girls," part "Pretty Little Liars" this novel will appeal to savvy readers with a passion for fashion and a penchant for naughty, haughty runway model ideals and diva behavior.

Brooke Berlin is the sixteen year old daughter of macho, masculine, and beautiful man-hunk Hollywood action movie star Brick Berlin. Brick has never met a camera, or a woman, he didn't like. His hazel eys, his brooding good looks, and his stone cold abs leave women fainting in his wake. Brooke hopes to use her father's celebrity to open her own doors. When she's out power shopping on Rodeo Drive--her favorite past-time--she manages to catch the eyes of the papparazzi, stealing the thunder from "one of the lesser Kardashians." (funny, right?)

Her life is sweet--being the pampered princess in a huge Hollywood mansion--the mansion so huge that their house "embarrassed mansions" nearby--armed with an assistant named after a creamy French cheese--Brie, and a best friend named after a peppery, fancy lettuce--Arugula, and able to spend unlimited amounts of cash and credit on fashion finds should make a girl happy, but Brooke longs for her father's undivided attention--she needs some serious "face time" with Poppa. Just once, she would love five minutes alone with her famous father--without interruptions from his agent, his publicist, his assistant, his assistant's assistant, his astrologist, his trainer, or any of the other minions who flock to his famous feet. Poor, spoiled Brooke remains a Paris Hilton wanna-be with serious daddy issues. Her mother escaped Hollywood years earlier without looking back and has no relationship at al with her only daughter.

Enter Molly. Molly arrives out of nowhere from Cairo Park, Indiana. Her mother Lauren has just died after battling cancer, and on her death bed, announces that Molly is the secret daughter of Brick Berlin, famous Hollywood movie star. They met when Lauren was a costume designer on one of Brick's films. His films are quirkily titled like "Tequila Mockingbird" where his character "rescued his fiancee from South American sex slavery." Molly has no other living relatives, and she is shipped off to Hollywood to meet her famous new father and her half-sister.

There is no way Brooke is going to share the spotlight with some hayseed from Indiana and no way she's going to share a precious moment with their father--HER father. Brooke begins a campaign to let Molly know just how unwanted her presence is.

Enter Shelby, spoiled daughter of the entertainment industry's seedy tabloid magazine Hey! She makes it her job to befriend Molly, ruin Brooke, and gather notoriety for her own celebrity reporting. Shelby's an evil schemer who craves drama and spreads gossip. She invents half-lies and rumors and has the two celebrity siblings soon fighting.

The Hollywood glamour set always has had their bizarre behavior--from throwing parties for their pets to naming their kids. Spaulding, for example, is the the daughter of a professional tennis player who sold the naming rights to his kid (Spaulding tennis balls). Molly--the "normal" mid-west girl says, "Good thing he wasn't in NASCAR...she would have been named Valvoline!"

This novel has it all--sister in-fighting, abandonment issues by a parent, absent mother figures, clique-ish high school behavior, severe cattiness, and finally a happy ending.

Spoiled was a gift to read--impossible to put down and tickled my funny bone. Girls will love the unforgettable characters of Brooke and Molly and laugh at the fashion and celebrity jokes, like Brooke's nerves "were as frayed as a pair of tights on Taylor Momsen." (I know, funny, right?)

Recommended grades 7-12. Younger girls may not "get" the puns and fashion jokes or the snarky comments about the Hollywood in-crowd.

No sex. One f-bomb but it is well-deserved. The authors write the fashion blog Go Fug Yourself--check it out--clever and catty.

FTC Required Disclaimer: I received this book from the publisher. I did not received monetary compensation for this review.